How To Stop Being Shy

Hello, my name is Evanora and I’m a formerly shy person. That’s the way to announce that, right? Being shy is something that we’re either born with or happens in early childhood. It’s just the way we’re wired. However, it can be difficult for many reasons. It’s hard to meet new people, it can be challenging to go anywhere on your own, dating feels impossible, and even things like job interviews can be affected.

I’m here to tell you though, there is hope on the horizon. You can overcome being shy and it doesn’t have to be difficult. All it takes a little time, patience, and confidence. Continue reading below and I’ll tell you all the steps you need to overcome being shy the easy way.

Is Being Shy the Same as Social Anxiety?

The first thing we should discuss is a common question that gets asked. Is being shy the same as social anxiety? The answer is both yes and no. I know that seems a bit confusing but stick with me here.

Being shy can certainly cause the symptoms of social anxiety. Also, having social anxiety can cause you to appear shy. While the two definitions intermingle with each other, they are actually quite different.

Being shy is considered a normal part of someone’s personality. You might feel embarrassed easily, tend to remain quiet in social groups, and may not like to open up to new people. Most of the times this has a lot to do with your confidence. On the other hand, someone with social anxiety will experience an intense fear of social situations.

This is often accompanied by stress, panic, extreme nervousness, and varying physical manifestations. The main difference is shyness can be overcome whereas social anxiety will likely be constant. If you feel you might have social anxiety, we recommend talking to your doctor or other healthcare professional.

How to Overcome Being Shy (The Easy Way)

If your shyness is bringing you down, you don’t have to suffer any longer! Follow along with these steps and learn how to overcome your shyness the easy way.

Understand the Root of Your Shyness

This might be one of the more difficult steps to tackle but it’s essential before proceeding with the best. Understanding the root of your shyness involves some introspection and identifying why you feel the way you do. Is it due to a traumatic event from childhood? Is it due to a lack of self-confidence? When you explore these things and work to heal them, you’ll start to come out of your shell.

Know What Makes You Nervous

If you know what makes you feel nervous or shy, you will be able to plan ahead for it. For example, if public speaking makes you nervous, you can plan ahead by practicing your speech in front of smaller groups. If you notice you’re comfortable around friends and family but not strangers, then you know it’s only a matter of time before you’ll start to feel comfortable around them. Keeping this information in mind can ease your worries.

Fake It Until You Make It

This may seem like cliché advice but it’s been one of the best things I’ve done. No one knows you’re shy. The people you just meet only know what you tell them. Something I liked to do was pretend to play a character. It was just a modified version of myself that was more confident, smiled more, and made eye contact. When you start to practice these behaviors regularly, they’ll eventually grow into habits and soon you’ll forget you were even faking it in the first place. Check out a great TED Talk about this concept.

Accept Who You Are, Love Yourself, and You’ll Find Your Way

One of the major steps when looking for how to overcome being shy is simply accepting who you are and loving yourself. It’s okay if you can’t do that right away, faking it until you make it will aid in your efforts significantly. Once you learn to accept yourself and love yourself, the shyness will just seem to melt away.